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Q. What does HMO stand for? A. This is actually a variation of the phrase, "HEY MOE." Its roots go back to a concept pioneered by Moe of "The Three Stooges," who discovered that a patient could be made to forget about the pain in his foot if he was poked hard enough in the eye. Q. I just...

A biker stopped by the Harley Shop to have his bike fixed. They couldn't do it while he waited, so he said he didn't live far and would just walk home. On the way home he stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. He then stopped by the feed store/livestock dealer and...

I must have posted this on the wrong forum first time around, as it ended up in the newbies forum. I´ve been lurking for sometime on this issue, because there is so much confusion. Now that the enforcement has started, I hope that the enforcement experiences will be posted here on EO, and on...

I´ve been lurking for sometime on this issue, because there is so much confusion. Now that the enforcement has started, I hope that the enforcement experiences will be posted here on EO. My personal thoughts are, that the new rules were as well thought out as any bureaucratic major change, and...

Dear Tide: I'm writing to say what an excellent product you have! I've used it since the beginning of my married life, when my Mom told me it was the best. Now that I am older and going through menopause, I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new...

When asking for a mileage figure for all miles, I think some of you are missing the "key word" in what I was trying to say. The word "DEPENDS". I think that $1.00 a mile is achievable for all miles, but what are you talking about? Gross or net? Example: If you average $1.10 all miles (which in...

BEST BUMPER STICKER OF THE YEAR Best Bumper Sticker of the Year "If you can read this, thank a teacher.... If you are reading it in English, thank a veteran."

A newlywed couple (just two weeks). The husband, very much in love, still couldn't wait to go out on the town and party with his old buddies. So,he says, "Honey, I'll be right back." "Where are you going, coochy cooh?" asked the wife. "To the bar and have a beer, pretty face." The wife said...

I see lots of opinions on this forum, addressing every question that prospective newbies would like answered. Most are valid and thoughtful answers from the point of view of the author. Some are transparent garbage from wannabe trucking experts. The truth is that none of us are true experts...

1. Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants. 2. Marriage changes passion. Suddenly you're in bed with a relative. 3. I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it. So I said "Implants?" She hit me. 4. I don't do drugs. I get the same...

The Lone Ranger was ambushed and captured by an enemy Indian war party. The Indian Chief proclaims, "So, you are the great Lone Ranger. In honor of the Harvest Festival, you will be executed in three days. But, before I kill you, I will grant you three requests. What is your first request?" The...

And what are you looking for in 2004? Put it down here, and not necessarily your trucking accomplishments only. I ran less this year than in previous years, but it was my choice, not business slowdown. I probably actually ran under 6 months the whole year, and some of that was for a friend...

The sleigh was all packed, the reindeer were fed, But Santa still knelt by the side of the bed. "Dear Father," he prayed "Be with me tonight. There's much work to do and my schedule is tight. I must jump in my sleigh and streak through the sky, Knowing full well that a reindeer can't fly. I will...

My husband, not happy with my mood swings, bought me one of those new mood rings the other day so he would be able to monitor my mood swings. When I'm in agood mood, it turns a lovely shade of green. When I'm in a bad mood, it leaves big f#!!%#!! red mark on his forehead. Maybe next time...

I just got a copy of this in my inbox, and you can imagine how startled I was reading that unions have gone as far as the North Pole. Please explain this to your readers. Letter FROM Santa Claus... I regret to inform you that effective immediately, I will no longer be able to serve the...

Santa My Man....Just send me someplace warm, and for a gift when I get there, I´d like a very large beach towel, and a wet girl. Maybe she will turn out to be what I´ve been looking for. Loaded. Gorgeous. Can´t keep her hands off me. And is too proud to have HER MAN work for a living. Also a...

FROM: Patty Lewis, Human Resources Director TO: All Employees DATE: October 01, 2003 RE: Christmas Party I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the private function room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar...

These classes are also learning intensive and will only accomodate eight participants per class. Cell phones must be left at the front desk. 1. Silence, the Final Frontier: Where No Woman Has Gone Before 2. The Undiscovered Side of Banking: Making Deposits 3. Parties: Going Without New Outfits...

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty of their contents, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants each. Topic 1. How to fill ice-cube trays. Step by step with slide presentation. Topic 2. Lavatory paper rolls: do they grow on the holders? Round-table discussion...

This is a question that has gone unanswered for centuries...... but, now we know. If you put a woman on a pedestal and try to protect her from the rat race...you're a male chauvinist. If you stay home and do the housework...you're a pansy. If you work too hard...there's never any time...