Apple Claims New iPhone Only Visible To Most Loyal Of Customers

[Lawrence]

SAN FRANCISCO—In a move expected to revolutionize the mobile device industry, Apple launched its fastest and most powerful iPhone to date Tuesday, an innovative new model that can only be seen by the company's hippest and most dedicated customers.
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[Turtle]

"Not only does it look awesome, but it can do pretty much anything you want as long as you believe in it."

Outstanding!