In The News

Owning the Wheel

As I write my column this month our economy is in turmoil, the cost of fuel has gone through the roof and it sometimes seems like the American dream has turned into a nightmare. Like the flag in the rockets red glare, our constitution has been battered and torn and truckers are being subjected to ever tightening restriction.

With all this negativity floating around I thought it might be a good time to take a look at what’s right with life and maybe count our blessings instead of focusing on our problems. This month’s column is a reprint of an article I did back in ‘99 and I think it fits the times. The first part of this comes from a story that was going around on the internet back then, but it really is a story for all seasons.

A story for all seasons

My brother-in-law opened the bottom drawer of my sister’s bureau and lifted out a tissue wrapped package.  “This,” he said, “is not a slip. This is lingerie!” He discarded the tissue and handed me the slip. It was exquisite, silk, handmade and trimmed with a cobweb of lace.

The price tag with an astronomical figure on it was still attached. “Jan bought this the first time we went to New York,” he continued. “Must have been eight or nine years ago. She never wore it, said she was saving it for a special occasion. Well, I guess this is a special occasion.”

He took the slip from me and put it on the bed with the other clothes we were taking to the mortician. His hands lingered on the soft material for a moment, then he slammed the drawer shut and turned to me.

“Don’t ever save anything for a special occasion!” he said, tears welling up in his eyes. “Every day you’re alive is a special occasion.”

I remembered those words through the funeral and the days that followed when I helped him and my niece attend to all the sad chores that follow an unexpected death. I thought about them on the plane returning home from the small Midwestern town where my sister’s family lives. I thought about all the things that she hadn’t seen or heard or done. I thought about the things that she had done without realizing that they were special.

All of us need to think about those words, for they can bring about a transformation in our everyday lives and help us recapture the joy and wonder of life.

“Every day you’re alive is a special occasion.”

Every moment offers some new smell, taste, sight or sound. Whether these events happen around you or to you is your choice. You can seize these events, savor them and make them a part of you, or you can let the moment slip by unnoticed. Once missed though, the moment is gone, it will never return. You will not have a second chance to recapture that moment and play it over again. 

As you roll down the road there is often nothing else to do but sit and think. Life on the road is often hard to cope with. You’re away from your family and friends, often burdened with a heavy work load, a tight schedule and a hundred other distractions and excuses for feeling down. It’s easy to fall into the trap of letting these seeming negatives take over your thoughts and drive you further and further down. But this is a path to nowhere. It’s the road to unhappiness, to family discord and to regret. 

There is another option, and that is to realize that not just every day, but every moment is special. As truckers you’re much closer to death than the average office worker. A four wheeler may cross the center line and take you out at any moment. Every day you see the drunks, the careless, the foolish lying on the side of the road with a sheet over them. Use this to your advantage use it as a reminder that each moment is too special to be missed. When you have time to sit and think, look out at the world and capture the here and now.

The colors of fall, the grace of the hawk soaring overhead, the fresh smell of spring, the world is filled with wonders which most of us take for granted and therefore never really see. Most of us spend our time thinking about what we don’t have and what we want, which of course leaves us feeling empty and unsatisfied. If we turn that around and spend our time instead thinking about all the things we have and have accomplished, you’ll find that you end up feeling satisfied and happy with life.

If you concentrate on what’s right with your life instead of what’s wrong with it you’ll find a wealth of things you never realized you had, and it’s amazing how once you begin to see the good things that are all around you, you suddenly start finding more of them in your own life.

The holiday season is a time for caring and sharing and gives you a perfect opportunity to share your new found happiness with others. A gift doesn’t need to be a present wrapped in brightly colored paper. A smile, a kind word, backing out of it to let a slower truck out in front of you--these are all gifts. They are gifts that say “Hey, you’re a person and you deserve respect and consideration, and I’m going to give them to you.” They’re gifts that cannot help but brighten the recipient’s day.

If you’re stuck out on the road for the holiday, go into the truck stop and share dinner with another driver who’s also away from his family and friends on this special night. Share what’s right about the night with others who may still be dwelling on what’s wrong and let that be your gift. There is certainly no more precious gift that any of us may give to another than a little piece of ourselves.

In this time of turmoil let’s all make an effort to greet each day with a smile instead of a frown. Let’s all spend a little less time complaining and a little more time praising, a little less time scoffing and a little more time enjoying. Live life to its fullest, enjoy every moment of it and remember that the special occasion you were waiting for is NOW.

Till next year be safe.

John Ewing is a former owner/operator and the author of The Truckers Helper, business management software for truckers. If you'd like to ask questions or make comments on this article please visit the forums at www.thetruckershelper.com. He will be happy to answer any questions on trucking or managing your trucking business.