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A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre. After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van.* However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas. When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and...

MENTAL HOSPITAL PHONE MENU Hello and thank you for calling The State Mental Hospital .Please select from the following options menu: If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly. If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you. If you have multiple personalities, press...

A minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars. The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of...

Last night, my girlfriend and I were sitting in the living room and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle. If that ever happens, just pull the plug." She got up, unplugged the TV, and threw out my beer.

You have to follow the directions or else it won't work. This is really creepy! Think of a letter between A and W. Repeat it Out loud as You scroll down. Keep going . Don't stop . .. Think of an Animal That begins With that letter. Repeat it Out loud As you Scroll down. Think of...

The Trouble with Outsourcing I was depressed last night so I called Lifeline. I found myself in a call center in Pakistan. I told them I was suicidal. They got all excited and asked if I could fly a plane?*

Can you solve this puzzle? You are riding on a beautiful white horse. On your left side is a drop off. On your right side are several ostriches being chased by a lion. In front of you are four large gazelles which won't get out of your way and you can't seem to overtake them. Behind you is a...

The stats below by no means minimize the loss of those who are represented by the figures. But they are interesting... Check out the .pdf file at bottom. Below is some very interesting data referencing deaths in the military. I guarantee you will not read this in your local...

http://www.animatronics.org/strangers/strangers.htm

Even the Eye Bank has a slanted view.

DID YOU HEAR THE ONE ABOUT THE MAD GENETICIST? A geneticist wanted to be the first person to clone a human. He couldn't find a volunteer, so he cloned himself. His efforts were successful, and he was asked to address a conference. When he began to speak, his clone started swearing. Frustrated...

Do you know what happened this week back in 1850, 157 years ago? California became a state. The State had no electricity. The State had no money. Almost everyone spoke Spanish. There were gunfights in the streets. So basically, it was just like California is today... except the women had real...

Beer contains female hormones . Last month, National University of Lesotho scientists released the results of a recent analysis that revealed the presence of female hormones in beer. Men should take a concerned look at their beer consumption. The theory is that beer contains female hormones...

The long and short of it is this simple explanation in my view: Running a TT will give you much more flexibility in getting loads, which means you will be running more loaded miles. It costs the same 365 days a year to move freight from point A to point B, no matter what size truck it goes on. A...

A precious little girl walks into a pet shop and asks, in the sweetest little lisp, between two missing teeth, "Excuthe me, mithter, do you keep widdle wabbits?" As the shopkeeper's heart melts, he gets down on his knees so that he's on her level and asks, "Do you want a widdle...

About the time our original thirteen states adop ted their new constitution in 1787, Alexander Tyler, a Scottish history professor at the University of Edinburgh, had this to say about the fall of the Athenian Republic some 2,000 years earlier: "A democracy is always temporary in nature; it...

Saturday, August 18, 2007 An Open Letter To The Atlanta Chapter of the NAACP Dear Dr. R L White, Head of the Atlanta Chapter of the NAACP, My name is Mike. I am 27, and I am neither a member of your organization nor a resident of Atlanta. Normally I wouldn't bother you, but then I came across...

There are still plenty of trucks out there, without the auxiliary heat and AC units installed. What are you doing to compensate, in the states where they have the anti idling laws. What do you see in the way of enforcement? Winter is coming on, and summer in some places was HOT, with a repeat...

Like a lot of folks , I have a job. I work, they pay me. I pay my taxes and the government distributes my taxes as it sees fit. In order to get that paycheck, I am required to pass a random urine test with which I have no problem. What I do have a problem with is the distribution of my...

"A politicians job is to get his hands on others people´s money." That said, "your job is to keep that politician from getting his hands on your money." Claim it. The worst that can happen if you really go claiming coo coo, is that you´ll be audited. If there´s a discrepancy that you can´t...