Search results

A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his. Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted...

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his...

Bob's Story... It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are oversensitive, and there's...

She is in the kitchen preparing to boil eggs for breakfast. He walks in. She turns and says, "You've got to make love to me -- this very moment." He embraces her and then gives it his all on the kitchen table. Afterwards she says, "Thanks," and returns to the stove. More than a little...

I don´t know why my doctor never told me about this. Did your doctor tell you? I guess we´ll have to start taking lunch at hooters more often. Do they have truck parking? AN EYEFULL A DAY KEEPS THE DOCTOR AWAY Staring at women's breasts is good for men's health and makes them live longer, a...

The Sheriff in a small town walks out in the street and sees a blonde cowboy coming down the walk with nothing on but his cowboy hat, gun, and his boots, so he arrests him for indecent exposure. As he is locking him up, he asks "Why in the world are you dressed like this? The...

Some of you may remember a post that I did here a few yaears ago when this topic first surfaced. For those of you who don´t, I´ll repeat. There is a lot of hoopla about Mexican trucks coming here, and it could all be political. When then mexican president Fox, needed some political capital to...

Don´t rush to get your shirt in a knot about the invasion of mexican trucks yet. The politicians still want to say a few words, that could take a few months, or years as we all know.The Bush administration wants to send inspectors to qualifymexican carriers to mexico BEFORE they are allowed in...

Recently an elderly Italian man, who lived on the outskirts of Monte Cassino, went to the local church for confession. When the priest slid open the panel in the confessional, the man said: "Father ... during World War II, a beautiful young woman knocked on my door and asked me to hide her...

(S)he will say anything you type. When you move the mouse around, her eyes follow the pointer. When you type something in the left space and then click on "Say it," (s)he will say it! You can also change persons doing the talking and the language they speak...

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good. 2. When in doubt, just take the next small step. 3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. 4. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does. 5. Pay off your credit cards every month. 6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to...

Paddy was driving down the street in a sweat because he had Important meeting and couldn't find a parking place. Looking up to heaven hesaid, Lord take pity on me. If you find me a parking place I will go to Mass every Sunday for the rest of me life and give up me Irish Whiskey!"...

What percentage of night driving do you do? Please specify single or team. I´m now taking some extended time off, and don´t know when or if I´ll come back to the road. Time to look at other options. During my long trucking career, I drove TT , and after those years, also expeditied in a D...

A guy goes to the US Post Office to apply for a job. The interviewer asks him, "Have you been in the service?" "Yes," he says. "I was in the army for three years." The interviewer says, "That will give you extra points toward employment," and then asks, "Are you disabled in any way?" The guy...

Let's say I break into your house: A lady wrote the best letter in the Editorials in ages!!! It explains things better than all the baloney you hear on TV. Her point: Recently large demonstrations have taken place across the country...

A blonde heard that milk baths would make her beautiful. She left a note for her milkman to leave 25 gallons of milk. When the milkman read the note, he felt there must be a mistake. He thought she probably meant 2.5 gallons. So he knocked on the door to clarify the point. The blonde came to...

Ephraim joined the army, and was shipped overseas. His redneck mom wrote him this letter. Dear Eph, I am writing this slow because I know that you can't read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the paper that most accidents happen within 20 miles from your...

A Japanese company (Toyota ) and an American company (General Motors) decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River . Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race. On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile. The Americans, very discouraged and...

http://tinyurl.com/yxewot

The Style Invitational is another annual contest that asks people to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing one letter,and only one, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners: 1. Bozone (n.) The substance surrounding stupid people that...