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Senior Computer Skills....... Tech support: What kind of computer do you have? Customer: A white one... Tech support: Click on the 'my computer' icon on to the left of the screen. Customer: Your left or my left? ************************ Customer: Hi, good afternoon, this is...

EVER SINCE I WAS A CHILD, I'VE ALWAYS HAD A FEAR OF SOMEONE UNDER MY BED AT NIGHT. SO I WENT TO A SHRINK AND TOLD HIM: I've got problems. Every time I go to bed I think there's somebody under my bed!! I'm scared. I think I'm going crazy. Just put yourself in my hands for one year, said the...

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As it's no longer politically correct to direct a joke at any racial or ethnic minority, try this one:- An Englishman, a Scotsman, an Irishman, a Welshman, a Ghurkha, a Latvian, a Turk, an Aussie, a German, a Yank, an Egyptian, a Jap, a Pakistani, a Mexican, a Spaniard, a Russian, a Pole, a...

Miss Beatrice, The church organist, Was in her eighties And had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared...

Only the brightest of senior citizens....you only need 4 correct out of 10 questions to pass. 1) How long did the Hundred Years' War last? 2) Which country makes Panama hats? 3) From which animal do we get cat gut 4) In which month do Russians celebrate the October Revolution? 5) What...

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. (What did she think, I had an elephant?) So because I'm retired and have little to do, on...

This one is priceless. A lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address!! A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic...

A man received the following text from his neighbor... I am so sorry Bob. I've been riddled with guilt and I have to confess; I have been helping myself to your wife day and night when you're not around. In fact, I have probably been getting more than you. I do not get it at home - but...

Michael Brown’s Case Not Vindicated by UN...He’s an Entitled Thug! by Susan Horton A UN official lambasted the “entitlement” of the parents of slain Ferguson, Mo. teen Mike Brown after they addressed the United Nations Committee Against Torture. On November 12, 2014, the National Report...

No wonder he was selected by Forbes as the most powerful person in the world. This is one time our elected leaders should pay attention to the advice of Vladimir Putin. I would suggest that not only our leaders but every citizen of USA should pay attention to this advice. How scary is...

Jiggs McDonald, NHL Hall of Fame broadcaster speaking in Ontario, says, "I am truly perplexed that so many of my friends are against another mosque being built in Toronto. I think it should be the goal of every Canadian to be tolerant regardless of their religious beliefs. Thus the mosque...

Check this out. It will give you perspective. http://www.buzzfeed.com/daves4/the-universe-is-scary

This story is confirmed in Elmer Bendiner's book, The Fall of Fortresses. *Sometimes, it's not really just luck.* Elmer Bendiner was a navigator in a B-17 during WW II. He tells this story of a World War II bombing run over Kassel, Germany, and the unexpected result of a direct hit on their gas...

Have Fun With This Little Test 1. When did ''Little Suzie'' finally wake up? (a) The movie's over, it's 2 o'clock (b) The movie's over, it's 3 o'clock (c) The movie's over, it's 4 o'clock 2. ''Rock Around The Clock'' was used in what movie? (a) Rebel Without A Cause (b)...

At the root of every grey hair, there is a dead brain cell. Someone had to remind me, So I'm reminding you too! Don't laugh....It is all true! Perks of reaching 50 Or being over 60 And heading towards 70 or beyond! 1. Kidnappers are not very Interested in you. 2...

One Sunday morning, the pastor noticed little Alex standing in the foyer of the church staring up at a large plaque. It was covered with names and small American flags mounted on either side of it. The six-year old had been staring at the plaque for some time, so the pastor walked up, stood...

Number 10 Only in America could politicians talk about the greed of the rich at a $35,000.00 per plate Obama campaign fund-raising event. Number 9 Only in America ...could people claim that the government still discriminates against black Americans when they have a black President, a...