theoldprof
Veteran Expediter
From an email
Yesterday I was at my local Target buying a large bag of Purina dog
> chow for my loyal pet, Solo, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout
> line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
>
> What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
> little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
> was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
> because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
> pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming
> out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
> that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and
> simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is
> nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.
> (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now
> enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
> food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an
> Irish Setter's azz, and a car hit us both.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
> laughing so hard. Target won't let me shop there anymore.
>
> Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in
> the world to think of crazy things to say
>
>
Just think, when you retire, you would be able to 'continue' doing crazy
things like these.....
Yesterday I was at my local Target buying a large bag of Purina dog
> chow for my loyal pet, Solo, the Wonder Dog and was in the checkout
> line when woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
>
> What did she think I had, an elephant? So since I'm retired and have
> little to do, on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I
> was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably shouldn't,
> because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50
> pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming
> out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way
> that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and
> simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is
> nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again.
> (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now
> enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog
> food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff an
> Irish Setter's azz, and a car hit us both.
>
> I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was
> laughing so hard. Target won't let me shop there anymore.
>
> Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the time in
> the world to think of crazy things to say
>
>
Just think, when you retire, you would be able to 'continue' doing crazy
things like these.....
