You know you live on the Gulf Coast when . . .
*You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.
*You have more than 300 C and D batteries in your
kitchen drawer.
*Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti
Os.
*You are thinking of repainting your house to match
the plywood covering your windows.
*When describing your house to a prospective buyer,
you say it has three bedrooms, two baths and one safe
hallway.
*Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written in Sharpie on
your arms.
*You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at
Home Depot.
*You are delighted to pay $3 for a gallon of regular
nleaded.
*The road leading to your house has been declared a
No-Wake Zone.
*You decide that your patio furniture looks better on
the bottom of the pool.
*You own more than three large coolers.
*You wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and>not feel the least bit guilty about it.
*You rationalize helping a friend board up by thinking
It'll only take a gallon of gas to get there and
back."
You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled
with water in your freezer.
*Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain;
today you can assemble a portable generator by
candlelight.
*You catch a 13-pound redfish. In your driveway.
*You can recite from memory whole portions of your
homeowner's insurance policy.
*You consider a "vacation" to stunning Tupelo,
Mississippi.
*At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy
with the biggest chainsaw.
*You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.
*There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.
*You can rattle off the names of three or more
meteorologists who work at the Weather Channel.
Someone comes to your door to tell you they found
your roof.
*Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
*Your "drive-thru" meal consists of MRE's and bottled
water.
*Relocating to South Dakota does not seem like such a
crazy idea.
You spend more time on your roof then in your living
room.
*You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer,>fence builder or a tree worker.
*A battery powered TV is considered a home>entertainment center.
*You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit>during the summer.
*Your child's first words, "hunker down" and you
didn't go to UGA!
*Having a tree in your living room does not
necessarily mean it's Christmas.
*Toilet Paper is elevated to coin of the realm at the
shelters.
You know the difference between the "good side" of a
storm and the "bad side."
*Your kids start school in August and finish in July.
*You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the
air conditioning.
*Dialing any phone number and hearing recording "Due
to the hurricane..." or "All circuits are busy..."
sounds normal.
*You laugh when you see that a digital cell phone is
"must have" equipment for your home emergency kit in
case of a terrorist attack or natural disaster.
*You think that a two-hour wait in line for the ice
truck delivery is "not too bad."
*You want to kiss the cashier at the Jack-in-the-Box
drive-thru for coming to work because they have ice
and power--even if they are serving ONLY Jumbo Jacks
and french fries.
*You think FEMA's services should be contracted out to
Walmart, Home Depot and the Waffle House chainstores
because they were open, even with no power, with chain
saws, generators, and food deliveries days before
FEMA.
*You have FEMA's number on your speed dialer.
*You have more than 300 C and D batteries in your
kitchen drawer.
*Your pantry contains more than 20 cans of Spaghetti
Os.
*You are thinking of repainting your house to match
the plywood covering your windows.
*When describing your house to a prospective buyer,
you say it has three bedrooms, two baths and one safe
hallway.
*Your SSN isn't a secret, it's written in Sharpie on
your arms.
*You are on a first-name basis with the cashier at
Home Depot.
*You are delighted to pay $3 for a gallon of regular
nleaded.
*The road leading to your house has been declared a
No-Wake Zone.
*You decide that your patio furniture looks better on
the bottom of the pool.
*You own more than three large coolers.
*You wish that other people get hit by a hurricane and>not feel the least bit guilty about it.
*You rationalize helping a friend board up by thinking
It'll only take a gallon of gas to get there and
back."
You have 2-liter coke bottles and milk jugs filled
with water in your freezer.
*Three months ago you couldn't hang a shower curtain;
today you can assemble a portable generator by
candlelight.
*You catch a 13-pound redfish. In your driveway.
*You can recite from memory whole portions of your
homeowner's insurance policy.
*You consider a "vacation" to stunning Tupelo,
Mississippi.
*At cocktail parties, women are attracted to the guy
with the biggest chainsaw.
*You have had tuna fish more than 5 days in a row.
*There is a roll of tar paper in your garage.
*You can rattle off the names of three or more
meteorologists who work at the Weather Channel.
Someone comes to your door to tell you they found
your roof.
*Ice is a valid topic of conversation.
*Your "drive-thru" meal consists of MRE's and bottled
water.
*Relocating to South Dakota does not seem like such a
crazy idea.
You spend more time on your roof then in your living
room.
*You've been laughed at over the phone by a roofer,>fence builder or a tree worker.
*A battery powered TV is considered a home>entertainment center.
*You don't worry about relatives wanting to visit>during the summer.
*Your child's first words, "hunker down" and you
didn't go to UGA!
*Having a tree in your living room does not
necessarily mean it's Christmas.
*Toilet Paper is elevated to coin of the realm at the
shelters.
You know the difference between the "good side" of a
storm and the "bad side."
*Your kids start school in August and finish in July.
*You go to work early and stay late just to enjoy the
air conditioning.
*Dialing any phone number and hearing recording "Due
to the hurricane..." or "All circuits are busy..."
sounds normal.
*You laugh when you see that a digital cell phone is
"must have" equipment for your home emergency kit in
case of a terrorist attack or natural disaster.
*You think that a two-hour wait in line for the ice
truck delivery is "not too bad."
*You want to kiss the cashier at the Jack-in-the-Box
drive-thru for coming to work because they have ice
and power--even if they are serving ONLY Jumbo Jacks
and french fries.
*You think FEMA's services should be contracted out to
Walmart, Home Depot and the Waffle House chainstores
because they were open, even with no power, with chain
saws, generators, and food deliveries days before
FEMA.