Walking into bars
- Thread starter dcalien
- Start date
PalletJack
Expert Expediter
A proton walks into a bar
He asks for a drink.
The bartender asks, “Are you sure?”
the proton says, “Yeah. I’m positive.”
He asks for a drink.
The bartender asks, “Are you sure?”
the proton says, “Yeah. I’m positive.”
slfisher45
Expert Expediter
A termite walks into the bar and asks, "Where is the bar tender?"
Two blonds walk into a bar...you think one of them would've seen it.
A guy walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road."
An amnesiac walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do I come here often?"
A guy with dyslexia walks into a bra.
A young Texan walks into a bar and orders a drink. "Got any ID?" asks the bartender. The Texan replies, "About what?"
A pair of battery jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender says, "You can come in here, but you better not start anything!"
This cowboy walks into a bar and orders a beer. His hat is made of brown wrapping paper. And so are his shirt, vest, chaps, pants, and boots. His spurs are also made of paper. Pretty soon, the sheriff arrives and arrests him for rustling.
An amnesiac walks into a bar and asks the bartender, "Do I come here often?"
A guy with dyslexia walks into a bra.
A young Texan walks into a bar and orders a drink. "Got any ID?" asks the bartender. The Texan replies, "About what?"
A pair of battery jumper cables walk into a bar. The bartender says, "You can come in here, but you better not start anything!"
This cowboy walks into a bar and orders a beer. His hat is made of brown wrapping paper. And so are his shirt, vest, chaps, pants, and boots. His spurs are also made of paper. Pretty soon, the sheriff arrives and arrests him for rustling.
A goldfish flops into a bar. The bartender asks, "What can I get you?" The goldfish says, "Water. Neat."
René Descartes is in a bar at closing time. The bartender asks him if he'd like another drink. Descartes says, "I think not," and he disappeared.
A little pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them and the bartender says, "Don't you want to know where the toilet is?" The pig says, "No, thanks, I go wee-wee-wee all the way home."
A Russian, a Frenchman, and a Canadian walk into a bar. The Russian asks the bartender for vodka, so he gives him an entire bottle. The Russian pours out a shot, drinks it, and throws the rest of the bottle into the air and shoots it. The bartender asks, "What did you do that for?" and the Russian replies, "In my country, we have too much vodka."
The bartender shakes his head and turns to the Frenchman, who orders wine. The Frenchman pours a glass, drinks it, then throws the rest of the bottle in the air and shoots it to smithereens. "In my country," he says, "we have too much wine."
The bartender shakes his head again, and turns hesitantly to the Canadian to ask him what he would like. The Canadian orders a beer, drinks the whole bottle in one go, then pulls out his gun and shoots the Frenchman.
"In my country," he says, "we have too many Frenchmen."
René Descartes is in a bar at closing time. The bartender asks him if he'd like another drink. Descartes says, "I think not," and he disappeared.
A little pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them and the bartender says, "Don't you want to know where the toilet is?" The pig says, "No, thanks, I go wee-wee-wee all the way home."
A Russian, a Frenchman, and a Canadian walk into a bar. The Russian asks the bartender for vodka, so he gives him an entire bottle. The Russian pours out a shot, drinks it, and throws the rest of the bottle into the air and shoots it. The bartender asks, "What did you do that for?" and the Russian replies, "In my country, we have too much vodka."
The bartender shakes his head and turns to the Frenchman, who orders wine. The Frenchman pours a glass, drinks it, then throws the rest of the bottle in the air and shoots it to smithereens. "In my country," he says, "we have too much wine."
The bartender shakes his head again, and turns hesitantly to the Canadian to ask him what he would like. The Canadian orders a beer, drinks the whole bottle in one go, then pulls out his gun and shoots the Frenchman.
"In my country," he says, "we have too many Frenchmen."
Are you sure he wasn't a frayed knot ???
CharlesD
Expert Expediter
That's it. I just spelled it the other way to see if somebody wouldn't get it.